Today, Abbie (my ‘just turned’ 13 year old) got her RPE (Rapid Palatal Expander).
This is the key I have to use nightly to crank it:
The string is in case I suck at this and lose it and she swallows it.
A huge #MomFail, waiting to happen.
I looked at this string and key – that looks and feels like a bent paper clip, and I watched her with the apparatus in her mouth, trying to talk, trying to swallow, and I could feel my fear and panic creeping up.
What if she swallows it? What if I lose it? What if she chokes on food, or spit?
What if?
What if?
What if?!
WHAT IF?!?!
Fears I didn’t even know I had.
My mind thought of a million different possibilities. Different scenarios.
And none of them were good. They were all scary and based on fear.
Yet, tonight, I had to crank that thing.
I didn’t lose the key.
She didn’t swallow it.
It was a big moment for me.
It sounds silly and trivial.
Unless you’ve had a fear, and you faced it, and succeeded.
And then…
Then – it is huge.
This is the 21st post in a 31 Day Series: 31 Days to Peace: Finding inner peace for anxiety and panic attacks. Start from the beginning here.
